By Rob Andrews with paraphrased content from M. O’Brien’s mindsetting workshop and Jen Sincero’s book You are Badass: Stop Doubting Your Greatness and Start Living an Awesome Life  

Learn to Give

“It is one of the beautiful compensations in this life that no one can sincerely try to help another without helping himself.” —Ralph Waldo Emerson

For some of us, the desire to give and bless others is innate; for others, we need to work a little harder at it. Regardless, the benefits in joy and life satisfaction are well worth it and you will likely find that you get far more pleasure out of giving than receiving blessings yourself.

Remember, every action in life has an equal and opposite reaction. If you open yourself up to giving to those around you, the universe (or nature, or God, or whatever you want to call it) will give back to you—sometimes physically/financially, and other times through a stronger network, a sense of well-being, or through various forms of unexpected opportunities.

Giving to others and receiving gifts in turn is a manifestation of gratitude and a way to surrender to the flow. Jen’s advice is simple: Give out joy and gratitude to the universe, and the universe will find a way to return it to you.

How to Get over Your BS Already!

“In order to kick ass, you must first lift up your foot.” If there is something you truly want out of life and you aren’t doing anything to go after it, chances are good you’ve found a way to lie to yourself. You might be telling yourself you’re unqualified for the task or that no one would want you to do it. But beware, oftentimes when we tell ourselves we are unqualified for something, we are too scared to try.

If something is your dream, why put energy into convincing yourself that you can’t do it? Go for your goals and remember that we are all capable of so much more than we give ourselves credit for. Odds are good that if you are drawn towards something it means that you have some natural talent for it, so tap into yourself and give yourself the chance to blow everyone away!

Apply for that job you feel unqualified for, take that risk for something you love that might end badly. The first step is believing in yourself enough to act. Remember, if you’re serious about changing your life, you can always find a way.

Fear is for Losers

“Life is either a daring adventure, or nothing. To keep our faces toward change and behave like free spirits in the presence of fate is strength undefeatable.” —Helen Keller

Fear is an entirely normal, and often necessary feeling. If not for fear, how would we know to stay away from steep edges or red-hot metals? Yet, fear can hold us back from what we can achieve. In most cases, fear is a choice. It’s up to you to decide whether you want to give your fears the power to stop you from going after what you want.

Fear is instilled in us from a young age. We see it on the news every day and in our childhoods as our parents navigated difficult job markets. Fear becomes so normal in our daily lives that we rarely question the rationality of its presence. Yet, big success often requires big risk, and risk can’t be undertaken without fear. You need to decide for yourself whether your faith in the unknown and your own abilities is greater than your fear of failure. If they are, you are ready to start the process of overcoming them and moving towards the life you desire. Here are six ways to get started:

1. View fear from your review mirror: don’t let it hold you back from moving forward.
2. Flip the fear: The fear of failure is scary. But how much worse is the failure of never trying? Remember that you will always be happier with yourself for going after what you want, no matter the outcome.
3. Be in the moment: Don’t let your mind turn towards anxieties about a future you can’t control- stay in the moment and work only with the problems at hand.
4. Cut off the stream of crap: negative self-talk will get you nowhere, so TURN IT OFF.
5. Don’t think of anything upsetting in bed at night: at night your mind is liable to race towards worse case scenarios and erode your confidence in yourself. Don’t let it.

PART 5: HOW TO KICK SOME ASS

Commit to your Decision

“Success consists of going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm.” —Winston Churchill

So, you’ve committed to going after what you want with abandon and free of the fear of failure. That’s great, but what are you going to do when you inevitably face some failure anyways? Many times, people feel that they have decided for long lasting change, only to later learn they have committed to making changes just until it starts to become uncomfortable.

Look through the greatest success stories in history and you might be surprised to find plenty of failures in their wake. Thomas Edison made thousands of failed attempts at a light bulb before he stumbled across a technique that worked. Likewise, Henry Ford committed incomprehensible amounts of time and resources into demanding that his engineers invent the impossible. He was told over and over that it would never work… until one day it did.

Great success will necessitate a few failures first. Don’t fear these stop points, but rather see them as the road bumps and opportunities for reevaluation that they are.

Change the Way You Think About Money

“When you up-level your idea of what’s possible, and decide to really go for it, you open yourself up to the means to accomplish it as well.”

If you are like most people, you have a confusing relationship towards money. Though you likely think that you want more, you might have deep seated subconscious beliefs that money is intrinsically bad or that you don’t deserve to have lots of it. You might even fear that your clients or boss will abandon you if you ask for more.

Whether you are aware of these subconscious thoughts or not, they are likely affecting your ability to earn the money that you deserve. We set limits on ourselves to cap in our own potential, and there is a very good chance that you have found ways to limit your own earning potential without you being aware of it.

Once you have acknowledged this fact, it’s time to expand your beliefs about what you are worth. Remember that making more money isn’t about making money, it’s about expanding your beliefs about what is possible for yourself.

Rid yourself of your preconceived negative emotions towards money and think of it instead as a currency that the universe uses to validate you. Surely you are worth more validation! Believe that you are worth more, that the work will come to you and that you will be appropriately appreciated for it, and the universe has a way of making things work out.

Give yourself a clear idea of where you want to be and what steps are necessary to get yourself there. Then, work to make those steps a reality. Follow a plan to achieve the benefits of your labors you have decided you deserve, and step aside to allow the universe to make it a reality!

Key Take-Away:

The only limits that we have in life are the ones that we put on ourselves. The universe is filled with untapped potential for allowing us to live our very best lives, but it is up to us to find the ways to tap into this wellspring and make it work for us. By ridding yourself of negative subconscious thoughts and deciding that you are worth every good thing that the universe can throw at you, you will start to live a deeper, more intentional, and far more rewarding life.

Actionable insights:

1. Don’t put limits on what you can achieve: dream big, follow your passions, and let the universe fill in the gaps.
2. Your subconscious mind can be your own worst enemy. Don’t allow it to limit your potential with negative self-talk.
3. Live a life in deep connection with everything around you and you will find that beauty and meaning comes from keeping your mind in the present.

The journey toward a true high-performance mindset can be fun, enjoyable, and extremely rewarding. When the subconscious is “programmed” with the right data, you’ll move almost effortlessly toward your wildest dreams and loftiest goals. While learning how to systematically replace your limiting beliefs with liberating beliefs, you won’t have to “try hard” or force yourself into doing anything. Give us a shout and let’s start your journey.

Warmest Regards,

Rob

Rob Andrews
Allen Austin
Consultants in Retained Search & Leadership Advisory